What are you doing right now? This is the question permanently displayed at the top of my new Facebook profile and it’s referred to as a person’s Status. After one week on FB, I have about 50 friends… I wonder if that’s good? What’s the average? I saw someone who has hundreds of friends… seems unlikely… either that or I am woefully inept at making friends.
I think I only want to invite or accept invites from people with whom I am/was genuinely friendly at some point in my life… anything else seems like a popularity contest, or a need to fulfill some OCD-like compulsion (must have more friends… must have MORE FRIENDSSSS!!!). With each invitation I’ve sent I’ve included a personal message – in case someone doesn’t recognize the name at first, and just because it seems like the friendly thing to do. I’ve gotten a handful of invitations and responses with no message – essentially involving the click of a button on a screen and nothing else. Is that friendship?
Before the end of the week, I had reviewed the Info pages and Photos of all my friends… a great way to learn more without actually having a conversation with someone. Is that friendship?
I have had some conversations with a few people I wouldn’t have otherwise talked to, and I think that’s good. I learned my brother-in-law has been sick for about a week – get well soon Mr. T!; a college friend is unexpectedly moving back to the area where I live… the circumstances for the move are not great but it’ll be nice to be in the same neighborhood again; one of my childhood friends lost her home to a fire recently; and one friend married someone whose family is well-known in the film industry… it’s not George Clooney, but she did get to see George in person once and says he is just as nice looking as on-screen.
I also got to see pictures I’d never seen of myself from 18 years ago when several of us went to a local music festival for the weekend. I had short, short, short, above-my-ears-with-bangs-almost-a-bowl-cut hairdo and I was sssmokinggg… oooooo! One of my new friends saw the old me and said two things… I looked like Demi Moore… or like I was trying to look like Demi Moore... and my nose looked smaller then… I’ll try not to be Sensitive Suzy and just take that as a compliment.
So what’s my status? Given the current controversies around separating personal life from professional life in the world of social media, that’s a tricky, subjective question for which one must always apply a filter. Now that I’m a lightly-seasoned FB veteran, I think before sharing my status or anything else, on Facebook or anywhere else, I will use the 3M Rule: if I wouldn’t say it in front of my Mother, Manager or Minister… I probably shouldn’t say it at all.
Monday, February 16, 2009
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Very nice flow to this, Deborah. Impressive to say the least. As for clicking, I'm not sure if it equates friendship. I was wondering about this myself. I CAN tell you........more than 50 friends ain't bad even if 1/2 of them are clickers. I'm sitting almost on empty myself. I could add a few...but I am only accepting people I 'really' knew/know. You hit the nail on the head with that genuine thought. lynzi
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